Billboard Hot 100 Top 40 Review

Billboard Hot 100 Top 40 Review: December 2013

Well, it’s that time of the month where I look at the 40 biggest songs in the country right now. Since last month, there were a couple of  songs that made Top 40, some fell out, and others were still there. So I won’t discuss any song that’s on the Top 40 that I’ve already talked about in a previous review. Those will be left blank with the rating I gave it previously. If you’ve seen my previous review, you’ll already know that I’m rating reach song with a 5 point system, 5 being the highest and 1 being the lowest. Let’s get started.

#40. All Me-Drake ft 2 Chainz & Big Sean: I had a hunch that I wasn’t gonna like this song the moment I saw who was on it and I was correct. I don’t like this song. It’s annoying as hell, the rapping is atrocious, and the beat isn’t even that good. Though one part of the song had me busting up laughing and it was the beginning of Big Sean’s verse where he says,

Hoe, shut the fuck up

This shit had me dying. The fact that he said this after Drake’s chorus and the tone of his voice is hilarious. That is pure comedy. Anyways, what else is there to say about this song? It’s typical mainstream, braggadocio rap. Despite that hilarious line from Big Sean, I give this a 1 outta 5.

*/*****

#39. Sunny and 75-Joe Nichols: Another country song. Great. Some of you should already realize that I’m not the best person to go to when it comes to country music. I don’t listen to country music that much. So this will be a short review after a listen. It’s your typical country song tailored made for radio spins. Not the worst, but not the best. I give this a 2 outta 5.

**/*****

#38. Pompeii-Bastille: Boy, indie music really is blowing up. This song is pretty cool. It has a nice chorus, good production, the songwriting isn’t that phenomenal, though pretty solid. Not the greatest song ever, but it’s good. I have nothing else to say about it. I give it a 3 outta 5.

***/*****

#37. Dark Horse-Katy Perry ft Juicy J: Wow, Juicy J. You were that quick to sell out, huh? There’s nothing good I can say about this song at all, being that it’s from Katy Perry. It’s bland and soulless, the lyrics sucks, the beat has no energy, and, oh yeah, there’s an unnecessary rap verse. WHY?! I feel like Juicy J will work with anyone, no matter how much they suck. This song is a waste of time. Katy, do not make anymore hip-hop tracks. You already suck at making pop songs, so why do you gotta ruin rap? This gets a 1 outta 5.

*/*****

#36. TKO-Justin Timberlake: *****/*****

#35. That’s My Kind Of Night-Luke Bryan: ***/*****

#34. It Won’t Stop-Sevyn Streeter ft Chris Brown: This song is your typical modern R&B record. It sounds like every other song like it. It’s not the worst, but it’s not the best, either. Sevyn isn’t that great of a singer and Chris Brown does nothing to help this song. It’s just bland. This sounds like something that’ll get constant spins on 106 & Park and mot much else outside of that, so I’m baffled at how this made the Top 40. Like I said, it’s not terrible, it’s just boring. I give it a 2 outta 5.

**/*****

#33. Safe And Sound-Capital Citites: *****/*****

#32. Sail-AWOLNATION: *****/*****

#31. We Were Us-Keith Urban and Miranda Lambert: I really don’t have much to say about this song. It’s another typical country song. It sounds nice, both Keith and Miranda sound nice, I guess. If you’re a country music fan, I think you’ll like this song. It’s cool, but it does nothing for me at all. I give this a 3 outta 5.

***/*****

#30. Stay-Florida Georgia Line: Yeah, I don’t like this song. Even if I was a country music fan, I still wouldn’t like this. This is bland, pop-country trash. After they sold out with that god-awful Cruise song, I knew these guys were gonna suck and I was correct. There’s no redeeming quality to this shit. It gets a 1 outta 5.

*/*****

#29. Marry Me- Jason Derulo: */*****

#28. Love More- Chris Brown ft Nicki Minaj: */*****

#27. Slow Down-Selena Gomez: */*****

#26. Brave-Sara Bareilles: ***/*****

#25. Radioactive-Imagine Dragons: *****/*****

#24. Blurred Lines-Robin Thicke ft T.I. & Pharrell: ****/*****

#23. My Nigga-YG ft Jeezy & Rich Homie Quan: */*****

#22. White Walls-Macklemore & Ryan Lewis ft ScHoolboy Q & Hollis: White Walls is the recent single from Macklemore & Ryan Lewis and this is actually one of their weakest songs to date. It’s not terrible, it’s actually a good song. But compared to songs like Thrift Shop, Can’t Hold Us, and Same Love, this isn’t their best. It’s a song about cars, which isn’t anything new in hip-hop, but it’s not as obnoxious as some other rap songs about cars (*cough* Bugatti *cough*). The beat’s nice and laid-back, Macklemore’s verses are dope, ScHoolboy Q does his thing, and Hollis does a good job laying down the hook. Not Macklemore & Ryan Lewis’ best song, but this is a cool song to ride around to. I give this a 4 outta 5.

****/*****

#21. Burn-Ellie Goulding: Now this is pop music done right. Ellie Goulding is probably one of the most underrated artists out now. She has a unique voice and her songs are catchy as hell. A good example of that is this song, Burn. It’s well-written, it has a good beat, and a catchy hook. The fact that she’s achieving some success on the charts kinda restores my faith in popular music. If you wanna get into Ellie Goulding’s music, check out her recent album, Halcyon Days. There’s a lot of great pop music; you won’t regret it. I give this song a 5 outta 5.

*****/*****

#20. Holy Grail- Jay Z ft Justin Timberlake: ****/*****

#19. Stay The Night-Zedd ft Hayley Williams: Zedd is one of the newest EDM DJs to blow up on the charts. After Clarity became a Top 20 platinum-selling hit, he followed that up with this collaboration with Paramore frontwoman Hayley Williams, Stay The Night. This is a pretty good song. It’s catchy, it has great production, and it’s just fun to sing and dance to. Though it does get a bit repetitive at times, that’s just a minor issue. Overall, this is a cool song. I give it a 4 outta 5.

****/*****

#18. Sweater Weather-The Neighbourhood: *****/*****

#17. Do What U Want-Lady Gaga ft R. Kelly: By now, you already know my feelings about Lady Gaga and you probably expect me to tear this song apart, right? Well, you are correct. The only good thing I’ll say about the song is that the production is nice and, if given to an another artist (a good one, mind you), it probably would’ve been on my playlist. But that’s about all the positives I can say about this. It’s annoying repetitive, there’s too much Christina Aguilera-esque overly-dramatic singing, the songwriting’s beyond lazy, and there no chemistry between Gaga and Kells. What the fuck is R. Kelly doing here? Is he that desperate to sell out? People have said that this song is a shot at the media. Now looking at these lines, I can sort of see that.

But then you print that shit
That makes me want to scream

Write what you want
Say what you want ’bout me
If you wanna know that I’m not sorry

Wow, rip off Michael much? Anyways, I can understand how this is a shot at the media. But the idea that the entire song is about that is instantly shot down when the rest of the lyrics make it seem like it’s about sex. Gaga, if you’re trying to be clever by making a song taking a shot at the media and disguising it as a sex song, then you’re not that clever. Fuck his song ’till infinity. It gets a 1 outta 5.

*/*****

#16. 23-Mike WiLL Made It ft Miley Cyrus, Wiz Khalifa, & Juicy J: */*****

#15. Unconditionally-Katy Perry: */*****

#14. Applause-Lady Gaga: */*****

#13. Let Her Go-Passenger: ***/*****

#12. Bound 2-Kanye West: I didn’t like Yeezus at all. There’s only 3 or 4 songs on that album that I actually liked and one of them was Bound 2. This is legitimately the best song on the entire album. The only word that can describe this song is beautiful. It is beautiful. The production is just luscious; it’s very reminiscent of that College Dropout/Late Registration Kanye we all know and love. There was a good use of a Charlie Wilson feature. The lyrics are very childish and simple with a bunch of cringe-worthy lines, but that’s minor. But what sort of kills the song for me is the video that accompanies it. It is god awful. It is terribly cheesy. I dare anyone to watch the entire thing with a straight face and without wanting to exit out of it. But then that’d be too cruel. I don’t wanna tell you much about what happens in the video. Go on YouTube, look for the video, and find out for yourself. Anyways, back to the song itself. It’s one of Kanye’s best songs post-MBDTF. I give it a 4 outta 5.

****/*****

#11. Hold On, We’re Going Home-Drake ft Majid Jordan: */*****

#10. Say Something-A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera: There’s been a lot of slow piano ballads charting this year and this is one of them. This song became big thanks to AGBW’s performance of it on The Voice. So how is this song? It’s pretty good. The emotion’s real and raw, the backing music is simple like it needs to, and Christina doesn’t overdo the singing like she usually does, so that’s good. For some reason, I feel like Christina being on this song is just her trying to gain relevance in the music industry. I mean she’s still relevant overall, being a judge on The Voice and all, but when was the last time she had a hit song on her own? Her last two albums tanked and didn’t even go gold. It seems like she’s leaching on to some other artist’s song to get a hit and gain relevance. Oh, well. I’m probably over-thinking this. Say Something’s a good song, but not my favorite. I give it a 4 outta 5.

****/*****

#9. Roar-Katy Perry: */*****

#8. Story Of My Life-One Direction: */*****

#7. Demons-Imagine Dragons: *****/*****

#6. Wake Me Up-Avicii: *****/*****

#5. Counting Stars-OneRepublic: **/*****

#4. Timber-Pitbull ft Ke$ha: */*****

#3. Royals-Lorde: *****/*****

#2. The Monster-Eminem ft Rihanna: ***/*****

#1. Wrecking Ball-Miley Cyrus: */*****

So those were the Top 40 songs of the Billboard Hot 100 as of December 7, 2013. I’ll be doing another Top 40 Review next month. Stay tuned.

Peace!!

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