Welcome back to another Top 40 Review, where the top 40 songs of the US gets praised or criticized by me. Halloween is coming up in a couple of weeks, where there will be tons of costumes, candy, and scares. Why am I telling you this? No reason. Let’s start looking at some songs.
#40. Jealous-Joe Jonas: Remember a time when the Jonas Bros were relevant? Aren’t you glad that’s over? So now we have a single from one of these bland pricks. This guy is obviously trying to be like Justin Timberlake with this song, yet he doesn’t possess the coolness and swagger that JT has. The lyrics make him look like a douchebag, the production is nothing special, and every time he sings, he sounds like he’s constipated while getting kicked in the groin. This song is blech and it gets a 1 outta 5.
#39. Waves-Mr. Probz: There’s two versions of this song, the original and the Robin Schultz remix. Whatever version, I like this song. It has decent lyrics, nice production, and Probz has a good voice. Definitely a song that I look forward to have on replay. I give it a 5 outta 5.
#38. 0 To 100/The Catch Up-Drake: 00/00000
#37. Amnesia-5 Seconds of Summer: N/R
#36, This Is How We Do-Katy Perry: 0/00000
#35. Problem-Ariana Grande ft Iggy Azalea: 000/00000
#34. 2 On-Tinashe ft ScHoolboy Q: 0/00000
#33. Happy-Pharrell Williams: 00000/00000
#32. Blame-Calvin Harris ft John Newman: Haven’t heard from John Newman in a while since Love Me Again. Compared to that song, Blame isn’t better, but it’s still a good song. It has a nice beat and John just slays the track. Definitely one of Calvin’s better songs. It gets a 5 outta 5.
#31. Fireball-Pitbull ft John Ryan: I already explained my thoughts on Pitbull during my review of Wild Wild Love, so I’m just gonna get to this song. I have to admit I was expecting this song to suck big time, but it’s actually not that bad. I don’t think it’s that great, but I can’t really hate this. The lyrics are bad and dumb (it’s Pitbull, what did you expect?), but the production is very solid as it’s not one of those polished EDM beats that Pitbull is used to rapping over and the song is tons of fun. Just like Baliando, it has that Latin feel and it does a good job at both being an enjoyable party song and making an insufferable artist tolerable. Overall, I give this a 3 outta 5.
#30. Fancy-Iggy Azalea ft Charli XCX: 0/00000
#29. New Flame-Chris Brown ft Usher & Rick Ross: 0/00000
#28. Dirt-Florida Georgia Line: 00/00000
#27. All Of Me-John Legend: 00000/00000
#26. Lifestyle-Rich Gan ft Young Thug & Rich Homie Quan: 0/00000
#25. A Sky Full Of Stars-Coldplay: 0000/00000
#24. Something In The Water-Carrie Underwood: Not my favorite song, but this is a good song regardless. I think it might be one of the best country songs of the year, but what do I know? I rarely listen to country music. Anyways, this song has epic production and a vocal performance from Carrie that could send chills down your spine. While many mainstream country songs are about women, alcohol, and pick-up trucks, this one is about faith. It’s always good to see something different that’s also great. I give this a 5 outta 5.
#23. Trumpets-Jason Derulo: This song reminds me so much of why I can’t stand Jason Derulo. Dude is a douchebag with pussy on his mind, which this song showcases very well. The lyrics are laughably terrible. The production sounds like something that’d be played on Radio Disney. Jason’s voice is unbearable as all hell. The song concept and the execution are just lame. This is one of the lamest songs of the year and I’m amazed that people want to hear more of this crap. This gets a 1 outta 5.
#22. Am I Wrong-Nico & Vinz: 00000/00000
#21. Baliando-Enrique Iglesias ft Descemer Bueno & Gente de Zona: 0000/00000
#20. Burnin’ It Down-Jason Aldean: 0/00000
#19. Cool Kids-Echosmith: 00/00000
#18. Maps-Maroon 5: 0/00000
#17. Don’t-Ed Sheeran: 0000/00000
#16. Boom Clap-Charli XCX: 0/00000
#15. Chandelier-Sia: 0000/00000
#14. Rude-MAGIC!: 000/00000
#13. Steal My Girl-One Direction: This song is just like every other One Direction song, shit. Just another crappy boy band song. This gets a 1 outta 5.
#12. Hot Nigga-Bobby Schmurda: 0/00000
#11. Rather Be-Clean Bandit ft Jess Glynne: 00000/00000
#10. Break Free-Ariana Grande ft Zedd: 00000/00000
#9. Stay With Me-Sam Smith: 00000/00000
#8. Animals-Maroon 5: Wow. This is terrible. Maroon 5 might have made their worst song to date. The lyrics are creepy as hell as Adam’s singing about hunting a woman down like an animal. The way he sings it just makes it worse. *shudders* The production is nothing special as it sounds like it was made by someone else who isn’t the band. It’s sad to see them fall off in quality. I am officially no longer a Maroon 5 fan. They are dead to me. This song gets a 1 outta 5.
#7. Don’t Tell Em-Jeremih ft YG: 0/00000
#6. Habits (Stay High)-Tove Lo: 0000/00000
#5. Anaconda-Nicki Minaj: 0/00000
#4. Bang Bang-Jessie J, Ariana Grande, & Nicki Minaj: 0/00000
#3. Black Widow-Iggy Azalea ft Bootleg Beyonce aka Poor Man’s Rihanna aka Rita Ora: 0/00000
#2. Shake It Off-Taylor Swift: 0/00000
#1. All About That Bass-Meghan Trainor: 0000/00000
So those were the Top 40 songs on the Billboard Hot 100 as of October 11, 2014. Stay tuned next month when I do another Top 40 Review. Next week, two Target Practices. Yeah, two.