Random WTF Lyrics

Random WTF Lyrics #13

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Welcome to Random WTF Lyrics where I select five random bad lyrics from five random songs to make fun of. Let’s get started.

SMS (Bangerz)-Miley Cyrus ft Britney Spears

They ask me how I keep a man, I keep a battery pack

A battery pack? What the hell does that mean? Miley can’t be talking about actual batteries because what good is a battery if you’re dating someone. Maybe she keeps those batteries for her… dildos. I’m going off-track. Maybe battery pack in this context means that she keeps a bunch of dudes around like a herd of cattle, ready to be used for her sexual desires until they’re milked dry of their manly essence. That actually makes sense considering that it is coming from Miley Cyrus, of all people.

I’m flying high up on a bird, acrophobiac

Acrophobia is the fear of heights, so if you’re an acrophobiac and you’re flying on a bird AKA a private jet, then you’d be having a panic attack.

pilot: Attention all passengers. Please remain in your seats as we are about to takeoff.

acrophobiac: Wait, we’re taking off?

*plane flies*

acrophobiac: OH, SHIT!! WHO WOULD’VE KNOWN PLANES FLY?! GET ME OFF THIS MOTHERFUCKER NOW!!

Blah Blah Blah-Ke$ha ft 3OH!3

Zip your lips like a padlock

Padlocks don’t have zippers. Seriously. Google the inside of a padlock and find a zipper. You know something? If Ke$ha had said “lock your lips like a padlock” instead of zip, then it would’ve been a clever line. But that would require too much work from her. And I’m still not buying the whole parody excuse, this is just bad writing.

Glory Of Love-Peter Cetera

I am a man who will fight for your honor
I’ll be the hero you’re dreaming of

Yeah, you say that now, but what happens when it’s time to be a hero?

Peter: Baby, I’m a man who will fight for your honor.

*a thug show up with a gun*

thug: Alright, hand over everything you have right now and don’t try nothing stupid.

Peter: See ya, bitch. It’s been nice knowing you.

*runs away*

Drop Girl-Ice Cube ft Redfoo & 2 Chainz

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Yes, people. This is real. I didn’t want to believe that this exists, but it does. And it’s from Ice Cube. *sighs*

Drop girl
Drop to the drop, drop to the drop, drop, drop girl, drop
Drop to the drop, drop to the drop, drop, drop girl, drop
Drop to the drop, drop to the drop, drop, drop girl, drop
(If I hit the switch, I could make that ass drop)

Drop girl
Drop to the drop, drop to the drop, drop, drop girl, drop
Drop to the drop, drop to the drop, drop, drop girl, drop
Drop to the drop, drop to the drop, drop, drop girl, drop
(If I hit the switch, I could make that ass drop)

No. You did not just do that, Cube. You did not work in a line from your most well known song into this abortion of a club song. That is just desperation at the lowest. “HEY!! YOU KNOW I MADE IT WAS A GOOD DAY, HUH?! HUH?! YOU ALL KNOW AND LOVE THAT SONG, SO WHY DON’T I MENTION IT IN THIS NEW SONG I HAVE?!” This is the equivalent of somebody’s aging uncle trying so hard to fit in with the younger generation. Cube, you want to stay relevant? Sell some overpriced headphones like Dr. Dre is doing right now.

Yahhh!-Soulja Boy ft Arab

This song is stupid and nonsensical. But then again, that description could be applied to every song Soulja Boy releases.

(Hey, Soulja Boy, can I get your autograph?) Yahhh, bitch, Yahhh!

(Yo, Arab, I really like you, man) Yahhh, Bitch, Yahhh!

You wanna know something sad? A record label actually put money into this being recorded and released it for mass consumption. Meanwhile some unknown artist with actual talent is performing on the streets struggling for views and pennies. Onto these lines. First, I’m pretty sure nobody likes Arab because no one even knows who he is, so that’s unlikely. And second, dude, chill. All the guy wanted was an autograph. No need to be a dick about it.

celebrity: I am loving this life.

fan: Hey, I’m your biggest fan. Can I get an autograph?

celebrity *in rude British accent*: Huh!! Well, I never. A lowly peasant like YOU asking for MY autograph? Please. You are unworthy of basking in my luminance. Away with you, peasant. Away. Your rudeness and disrespect for privacy is stinking up the place.

This is why you don’t have anymore fans, Soulja Boy. You’re an ungrateful asshole.

So that was Random WTF Lyrics. No bad lyrics are safe.

Peace!!

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