Random WTF Lyrics

Random WTF Lyrics #14

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Welcome to Random WTF Lyrics where I make fun of six random bad lyrics from six random songs. It’s been a month since the last Random WTF Lyrics and I know some of you are waiting for a new installment of the series, so here it is. Why am I doing six instead of the usual five? Because I wanted to. Let’s get started.

Wannabe-Spice Girls

I wanna really really really wanna zigazigah

To this day, I still have no idea what the hell “zigazigah” means. Is that, like, some phrase for sex? Is this a British thing or did the Spice Girls make that up? Something tells me it’s the latter.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends (gotta get with my friends)
Make it last forever friendship never ends

Remember this helpful tip, fellas. If you want to be in a relationship with a woman, then have sex with her friends. …wait.

The Fix-Nelly ft Jeremih

Bust it open every time I get up inside
Soaking wet, turn the bed to a slip n slide

Eww. A slip ‘n slide? First, Wet The Bed by Chris Brown, now this? What is with some of these R&B tracks talking about urination? I do not want to hear about that. Maybe R. Kelly is more influential in more ways than we thought. “But what if these songs aren’t about…” DON’T… GO THERE.

Say Aah-Trey Songz ft Fabolous

Go girl,
Its your birthday
Open wide, I know you’re thirsty
Say Aah (Aah, Aah, Aah, Aah)
Say Aah (Aah, Aah, Aah, Aah)

Say aah? Are we at a club or the doctor’s office? I know what they’re talking about, getting drunk and all that, but that phrasing just brings up weird imagery. Like there’s a chick opening her mouth and her eyes are closed and then she opens her eyes up and finds a dude’s dick in her mouth and that dude happens to be a doctor. I picture the weirdest shit whenever I listen to music lyrics.

Shawty get you Homer would you be Marge Simpson

Get it? The Simpsons. Hey, Trey. You hear that sound? That’s the sound of nobody laughing at your play-on words. Even the crickets are silent.

You ever hear something that tries to sound smart, but ends up being dumb in the end?

Fly-Hopsin

Did the man who invented college, go to college?

Huh? Is Hopsin really asking if the guy who invented college actually went to college? Look, I like this dude’s music, but this has to be the most pretentious, most ill-conceived attempts at being deep. This sounds like one of those pseudo-philosophical rhetoric questions. You might as well ask…

Was the man who invented money rich?

Did the man who discovered outer space go to outer space?

Is a cup full of water half empty or half full?

Did Han Solo shoot first in Stars Wars?

Speaking of failed attempts at being deep…

Dooo It!-Miley Cyrus

Why do they put the dick in the pussy?

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………..

To have sex. That’s why. You insert the D in the P and go back and forth until the climax. That’s how the birds and the bees works. Are you gonna ask why people put food in their mouth? You have to be REALLY high in order to ask a question like this and I’m not exactly surprised that it came from Miley Cyrus.

Corona and Lime-Shwayze

Baby will be my, corona and lime
And I will be your, main squeeze
And if your brother don’t like my style,
We can take it to the street,
We can take it to the street

*uncontrollable laughter*
*uncontrollable laughter*

No. No. You can’t do that. You cannot threaten to fight someone after using that lame ass pickup line. You just don’t do that. Plus, it’s very difficult to sound intimidating when you’re singing over soft rock instrumentation.

So that was Random WTF Lyrics. No bad lyrics are safe.

Peace!!

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