Random WTF Lyrics

Random WTF Lyrics #22

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Welcome to Random WTF Lyrics where I select five random bad lyrics from five random songs. Let’s get started.

I’m Back-Eminem

Ah, yes. Eminem. One of the best rappers to ever bless the mic. Because I have a Musical Appreciation coming up this week, I decided to listen to The Marshal Mathers LP again. I’ll talk more about how great of an album it is on Friday, but all I can tell you now is that I’m enjoying it.

Cause if I ever stuck it to any singer in showbiz
it’d be Jennifer Lopez, and Puffy you know this!
I’m sorry Puff, but I don’t give a fuck if this chick was my own mother
I still fuck her with no rubber and cum inside her
and have a son and a new brother at the same time
and just say that it ain’t mine, what’s my name?

Did I ever mentioned that Eminem doesn’t give a fuck? Moving on.

No Broken Hearts-Bebe Rexha ft Nicki Minaj

Ay yo Bebe, anybody hating need pee pee

Wait. So, Nicki. People who are hating on you need to urinate? …………………. Mr. Spock?

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Completely illogical.

Or is she talking about penises? Well, what if some of her haters are male? Is she calling them gay? Wow. However way you look at it, this line is just dumb.

DMX

Now, technically, this next entry isn’t one song, but a series of songs. Why? You’ll see. As much of a DMX fan as I am, sometimes, he goes into really suspect territory with his lyrics. REALLY suspect.

Ruff Ryders Anthem-DMX

I’ma have to show niggaz how easily we blow niggaz

Get At Me Dog-DMX

And yo for real that nigga K can suck my dick

Top Shotter-DMX

Motherfucker, I’ll rip your butthole out of place

What’s My Name-DMX

Suck my dick
And while you niggas that’s been to jail before know it’s about to get thick
Let’s get it on baby
I’m gonna be goin’ against 4 niggas in one and you think you crazy?

Party Up-DMX

If I gotsta bring it to you cowards then it’s gonna be quick, aight
All your mens up in the jail before, suck my dick

Y’all niggaz remind me of a strip club, cause everytime you come around,
it’s like (what) I just gotta get my dick sucked

So whatever it is you puffin on that got you think that you
Superman I got the Kryptonite, should I smack him with my dick and the mic?

Where The Hood At-DMX

Once I split ya ass in two, you’ll be twice as butt
Yeah, you right, I know ya style – PUSSY cuz I’m fuckin it
Since we all right here, you hold my dick while he suckin it

I beat my dick and bust off in ya eye so you can see me coming

Dude, you’ve mentioned various sexual acts involving other men so many times that it no longer sounds like you’re dissing other dudes to me. It seems like you just want to have sex with them. And if that’s your thing, more power to you, but it’s a HUGE contrast to your gangsta rap image. Then again, people now have no problem with Young Thug being a thing, so… foreshadowing?

Round And Round-Tevin Campbell

One day I’ll make it in the big city
And I’ll be looking for a girl who’s pretty
One day I’ll make a play and she will say ok
’cause I plan to be a cool kitty

You sure about that, kid? What if she says no?

Tevin: Hey, girl. What do you say you and me go around the town?

woman: As if. Besides, it’s a school night; aren’t you supposed to be in bed?

Parents Just Don’t Understand-DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince

Here’s a classic from back when Will Smith was The Fresh Prince in this corny ass song complaining about parents not understanding their children. This was also the first rap song to win a Grammy. In the song, Will tells two stories, the first verse is about his mom taking him shopping and buying him old lame clothes for school and the second verse is him driving around town in his parents’ new Porsche while they’re away and  he picks up a girl to impress her, but…

I guess that’s why I didn’t notice that police car
We’re doing ninety in my Mom’s new Porsche
And to make this long story short – short
When the cop pulled me over I was scared as hell
I said, “I don’t have a license but I drive very well, officer”

Well, you’re obviously fucked.

I almost had a heart attack that day
Come to find out the girl was a twelve-year-old runaway

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WHAT?!

Come to find out the girl was a twelve-year-old runaway

“What a twist.”

You know? It’d be one thing if you were also underage when this happened, but Will Smith had to be either in his late teens or early 20s when he wrote this song. Why a twelve year old? God, I will never listen to this song the same way again.

So that was Random WTF Lyrics. No bad lyrics are safe.

Peace!!

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