Random WTF Lyrics

Random WTF Lyrics #25

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Welcome to Random WTF Lyrics where I select six random bad lyrics from six random songs. Let’s get started.

Take You There-Sean Kingston

We can go to the tropics
Sip pina coladas
Shorty I could take you there
Or we can go to the slums
Where killers get hung
Shorty I could take you there

I’m pretty sure everyone would rather go to the tropics than the slums. I mean, this entire song is about taking a girl out on a date in the hood. Why would you do that? How do you expect that to go?

guy: Hey, girl. Let’s go back to my place. It’s just past this gang-infested block.

woman: Are you sure it’s safe?

guy: Positive. I promise nothing will happen to you.

gang member: Aye, nigga!! Where you from?!

guy: Hey, fuck you!!

*gunshots*

guy: OH, SHIT!! LET’S BAIL!!

Lovers & Friends-Lil Jon ft Usher & Ludacris

Cause once you get inside, you can’t change your mind

Yes. Once you’re having sex, you can never decide to say no. Consent? What’s that? Ay dios mio.

Don’t Stop Wiggle Wiggle-Outhere Brothers

Well, here’s a forgotten dirty gem from the 90s. Probably for a good reason because of how atrocious it is.

Don’t stop movin’, baby
Ooh, that booty’s drive me crazy
Wiggle wiggle, wiggle wiggle
Don’t stop movin’, baby
Ooh, that booty’s drive me crazy
Wiggle wiggle, wiggle wiggle

Put yo’ ass on my face
I love the way your pussy tastes
Girl, you know you are the one
Take that ass and make me cum

Girl, you got to suck my dick
And you got to suck it quick
Girl, you got to suck my dick
And you got to suck it quick

Well, that’s… wholesome fun for the family. And to think this was a number one hit in both the U.K. and Ireland. What the hell is wrong with you people? Well, at least the States has some sense of dignity and not let a song with the word “wiggle” in the title become a hit- oh, wait.

Wiggle-Jason Derulo ft Snoop Dogg

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle
Just a little bit of… swing

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We let this happen, people. We let this happen.

Hot damn it
Your booty like two planets

A piece of advice to all women out there: if your butt is shaped like two planets, you might want to take it easy on the cheek injections.

Damn, baby, you got a bright future behind you

GET IT?! HE SAYS SHE’S GOT A BRIGHT FUTURE BEHIND HER BECAUSE OF HER ASS AND THERE ARE PROFESSIONS WHERE A NICE ASS IS REQUIRED LIKE A STRIPPER, VIDEO MODEL, OR PORN STAR!! HUH?! HUH?!

Why Can’t I Touch You-Ronnie Dyson

If you let me make love to you
Then why can’t I touch you?
If you let me make love to you
Then why can’t I touch you?

This line is so confusing because this dude wants to know why he can’t touch his woman even though she’ll let him make love to her, which, last time I heard, requires physical contact. Are they, like, having ghost sex? If so, that would be one hell of a sight to see.

Glamorous-Fergie ft Ludacris

Damn, It’s been a long road
And the industry is cold
I’m glad my daddy told me so, he let his daughter know
(If you ain’t got no money, take yo’ broke ass home)
My daddy told me so
(If you ain’t got no money, take yo’ broke ass home)
He let his daughter know

Fergie’s father told her that if she doesn’t have any money, then she should take her broke ass home?

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Windows_XP_BSOD

So that was Random WTF Lyrics. No bad lyrics are safe.

Peace!!

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