Target Practice

Target Practice: Ted Nugent “Cat Scratch Fever”


Welcome to Target Practice where bad popular songs of the past and present get shot. So. Ted Nugent. He’s a wild character. Member of the NRA and very outspoken about gun rights, which has become a hot button topic right now thanks to recent mass shootings. I don’t want to spend too much time on a political debate. I’m somewhere in the middle when it comes to guns. I’m not against guns or people having them for protection or sport, but I am for reasonable regulation that keeps them away from criminals or anyone who isn’t mentally fit to have them. I don’t agree with the extremists of both the left and the right. Let’s switch back to the subject at hand. Politics aside, I don’t really care for Ted Nugent’s music. He is a decent enough guitar player, but none of his songs have much replay value for me. Also, some of his most loathsome traits show up in his music, which brings us to today’s Target Practice. This is Cat Scratch Fever.

Well, I don’t know where they come from but they sure do come
I hope they comin’ for me

Just the kind of guy you want around your daughters, eh, parents?

And I don’t know how they do it but they sure do it good
I hope they’re doin’ it for free

And not like a prostitute or a porn star.

They give me cat scratch fever
Cat scratch fever

Is that code for STDs? Cause if you were to tell me that the guy above has STDs, I wouldn’t doubt you one second.

Well, the first time that I got it I was just ten years old
I got it from some kitty next door

Either Nugent was molested as a kid (which would explain a lot) or he fucked a cat.

An’ I went to see the doctor and he gave me the cure
I think I got it some more

He was fucking cats. I knew it. Ted Nugent is a furry confirmed. You didn’t hear that from me.

It’s nothin’ dangerous
I feel no pain
I’ve got the choo-choo train

It could also potentially land you in jail for statutory rape.

You know you got it when you, you’re going insane
It makes a grown man cry, cry, oh won’t you make my bed

Or shit yourself to avoid being drafted into war.

Well, I make the pussy purr with the stroke of my hand
They know they gettin’ it from me
They know just where to go when they need their lovin’ man
They know I’m doin’ it for free

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A reminder that VH1 called this the 35th best hard rock song of all time in 2009. To say that there are only 34 hard rock songs that are better is kind of insulting to say the least.

This song is year old kitty litter. Nothing wrong with the song musically, but it’s the writing that’s the issue. It sounds no different from any other sleazy rock song, but this particular one is about boning underage girls. And when you consider the fact that Ted Nugent once signed papers to become the legal guardian of a 17 year old in order to marry her AND the fact that he has a song called Jailbait, it makes the song even more icky. Now we know what Nugent and R. Kelly have in common. Cat Scratch Fever isn’t the worst song I’ve ever heard, but I can’t call it a good one, either. Next Target Practice, I’ll look at a song that’s currently on the charts. Which one, I don’t know. You’ll find out.



Monkey Wrench-Foo Fighters

5 thoughts on “Target Practice: Ted Nugent “Cat Scratch Fever”

  1. I’m glad you’re doing Target Practice on old music so you don’t look like a rockist.

    You should do one on “Christine Sixteen” by KISS. I love KISS, but that song’s lyrics are really gross.


  2. Agree with you on Cat Scratch Fever. As a big classic rock fan, I don’t mind a lot of these sleazy sex songs but this one is disturbing considering it’s about underage groupies and Nugent isn’t very subtle about it. Other than that, the instrumentation is standard classic rock. I also don’t really care about his music even as a rock fan since I mostly know him for being a right wing nutjob and I’m not one. On guns, I’m also with you on this issue. While I personally wouldn’t own a gun, I do agree that responsible, mentally sane people should be able to own a gun as long as they go through the necessary background checks and regulations to make sure they aren’t going to use the gun to kill scores of people like what happened in Texas today. I also believe that military assault weapons should be banned, courts should remove and ban weapons from the mentally ill and people with a history of crime and domestic violence. Luckily, I live in New York which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation and we haven’t seen any big mass shootings compared to states that don’t have strict gun laws like the last two big school shootings in Texas and Florida. On the federal level, I’m lucky to have my local congressman, a Democrat, fighting for gun control legislation that continues to go nowhere. On the state level, my local State Senator, a Republican, came out in support of gun control measures after Parkland only after voting against the same measures she now supports. I’ll be voting her out this November. I am also tired of the extremists on both the left and right. I am a registered Democrat since my views do align with the party but I don’t like to get involved in the extreme ways of thinking since they are the reason we are in this polarized climate right now and why we can’t get any gun control legislation passed in Congress now. I think of myself as a regular citizen who just wants something done on this issue so we don’t have to hear about these shootings month after month and worry about our safety in places where we should be the most safe. Good review!

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  3. Monkey Wrench Quintessential 90s hard rock/metal. I suggest looking at more 90s hard rock. many songs of the week come from the playlist of Radio X off of Grand Theft Auto San Andreas.


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